Archive for the 'Katie Price' Category



Katie Price has no shame


h1 Friday, November 30th, 2007

Katie Price purposely flashed her panties outside of a London club last night. I guess since she’s getting a breast reduction, she figured she’d show off her vagina. Makes sense. But seriously, what is she even doing? Is there a toilet on that van or something and she really has to pee? Or is that a hemorrhoid donut – Holy shit, it is! Whiskey. I need whiskey now! Pour it in my eyes! Hold on, brain, liquor’s coming! Don’t stop pouring until I forget my name. If I try to dry-hump the coffee table, that means it’s working.

NOTE: What’s that? Why yes, Katie Price is making out with her younger sister here.

Photos: Bauer-Griffin.com, INFdaily.com

Katie Price gives terrible Christmas presents


h1 Monday, November 26th, 2007

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Katie Price (a.k.a. Jordan the large chested, wonky-eyed Brit) is undergoing breast reduction surgery for Christmas, according to The Sun:

The former glamour girl, who was also showing off her new brown rinse, is going under the knife before Christmas to have a breast reduction for hubby PETER ANDRE.
She says the surgery will make them more “perky”.

I’m not a marriage counselor. But one time I chugged an entire Viking helmet full of beer. So close enough. Anyway, I always thought it went without saying that a breast reduction is the worst Christmas present any wife could get her husband – ever. I mean, besides telling him she’s pregnant. But, seriously, what is wrong with Peter Andre that he’d actually want this? Dude, if you’re tired of Katie’s gigantic cans, I’ll take her off your hands. That way you can have more time to spend with your glasses and hair gel. And, when I bring her back, that crazy eye will be back to normal. Don’t ask me how, but I’ll give you a hint: it’ll be from all the sex.

NOTE: I included pics from Katie’s launch of her new fragrance “Stunning.” Mostly because I’m impressed she’s actually making normal faces and, well, able to stand without tipping over.

Photos: Bauer-Griffin