Earl “DMX” Simmons Likes Setting Dogs on Fire
August 27th, 2007
Rapper DMX, best remembered for screaming about losing his mind between consistent blasts of a whistle, seems to like killing dogs almost as much as Falcons quarterback Michael Vick. TMZ reports
Maricopa County, Ariz. Sheriff’s Department raided rapper DMX’s home in Cave Creek and removed 12 distressed pit bulls. DMX, whose real name is Earl Simmons, has a long rap sheet, which includes a guilty plea to animal cruelty charges in 2002. A further search of the property yielded three canine corpses, one of which “seemed to be burned.” Also found — “a large number of weapons, some drug paraphernalia, and a lot of cars that don’t match the license plates.”
Well, there’s something you don’t see every day. A brotha with a stock pile of weapons and a bunch of stolen cars in his backyard. I asked my grandpa for his take on it, and he looked at me and said, “Well, what’d ya expect, dummy? You give ‘em forty acres and a mule and let ‘em vote and it’s bound to happen again.” “Um, what’s bound to happen, Grandpa?” I asked. “Hitch up the wagon, we’re goin’ into town! My pockets are on fire. Tuesday!” So I pressed the button on his morphine drip and paged the nurse to empty his bed pan again.