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Oregon’s main gay publication, Just Out, named Pretzel their “Top Hero of 2006.“

So rad. Thank you very much!!!

Top Heroes of 2006

1. Perez Hilton: The uncensored queer gossip blogger routinely outed celebrities who have been dragging their feet in making it official, including Jodie Foster, Queen Latifah and Clay Aiken. Good for him. This new approach–not shaming stars out of the closet but simply acknowledging something that is all but confirmed–resulted in several high-profile “admitted homosexuals.” Boy band blond Lance Bass of ‘NSync did the “Yep, I’m Gay” thing and immediately hit the party circuit with his yummy arm candy, Amazing Race winner Reichen Lehmkuhl. Two television doctors–T.R. Knight of Grey’s Anatomy and Neil Patrick Harris of Doogie Howser, M.D.–followed Bass out of the closet, leading everyone to wonder who’s next.

Click here to check it out.

‘’I like sexy people, and I think being yourself is sexy. Being yourself and being as good a man as I can be is sexy. My face is considered handsome. My body is considered well put together. For me not to appreciate that would be way out of line. It doesn’t mean that I’m not anything else.'’

- Mateo tells the new issue of Entertainment Weekly

She may be wanting us to believe that she is taming her wicked ways and cutting back on the booze, but Lindsay Lohan is still a hardcore party girl!

Friday night, the very vocal Alcoholics Anonymous-goer (with her requisite water bottle photo op) hit up Teddy’s in the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel.

The night before that she went partying at club Area.

And the night before that? Partying some more!

Nice to see some things never change.

· The Globes Double Dip: The nominations. The Studio 60 psych-out. Reactions and more reactions.
· Gentlemen, Start Your Campaigns: Critics agree on very little except Helen Mirren. A urinal, darkly. Remembering Ben. Little Children gets some play.
· Nicole Richie: Life in the Fast (and Wrong-Facing) Lane. The (accidental) Mel connection. The 911 calls. The RichieTracker7000™. The red menace made her do it.
· More gifts: CAA and WMA get into the iGiving spirit, while CAA East gets the Coby shaft.
· A Spinkin’ X-Mas 3.
· We could be Heroes, just not be gay.
· ChingChongGate gets an insufficient apology.
· Sylvester Stallone’s guilts you like grandma. The illustrated Rocky Balboa. The embellished Rocky. The Last Action Heroes are still managing to blow shit up.
· The Chosen One at half-a-year: Still gorgeous!
· Look for new LAT Sunday pull-out sections, “Yummy Hunks,” and “People I Hate.”

This is the best video about a director interacting with a puzzle we’ve seen since a behind-the-scenes clip on The Island DVD showing Michael Bay standing over a toppled Jenga tower at a wrap party and screaming, “Why didn’t you fucking tell me the fucking thing would fall over if I pulled that block out, you little piss-ant!” at a nearby PA. [via BoingBoing]
· Defamer PSA: If you’re thinking about drinking and driving tonight (and we know you are, because this is LA), you might want to avoid this section of Sunset Blvd. in Beverly Hills. At least the cops are giving you some advance warning.
· RAIN: CAN IT HAPPEN TO US?
· Hurty Elbow has compiled a gallery of Borats who don’t really look like Borat.
· You’re really not going to want order creamy salad dressing ever again after reading this, so just skip it.
· Doesn’t this story make you nostalgic for the summer, when it seemed every day brought a story of wild animals loose on aircraft?

a week before its official opening on Christmas Day, by sharing with you this exclusive preview of the movie musical with all the Oscar buzz. We’re confident all previous Effies will quickly fade from memory when you see it, and realize that what you are witnessing is a Chihuahua star being born. Either that, or that even a lapdog can steal a movie from Beyoncé. Enjoy.

• The Soup: Dreamgirls [YouTube]

Good news, heathens/Satanists/church-burning Nordic black metal bands: according to a study by nutbag finger-waggers show business watchdog group the Parents Television Council, the idiot box is twice the incubator of prime-time Godlessness that it was a year ago. And in perhaps the least surprising finding in the history of crackpot research projects, Fox is leading the charge against the faithful. Reports the LAT:

A study released Thursday by the Parents Television Council, a frequent critic of the TV industry over such issues as broadcast indecency, found that prime-time shows in the last year dealt with religion half as much as the year before. When they did, the Los Angeles-based group said, religion was cast in negative light more than one-third of the time.

The council said all faiths were included in their survey and that negligent and negative treatment of people of faith was out of touch with the strong religious beliefs of most Americans. […]

The study was the council’s seventh annual report on the subject. This year, the group pointed an angry finger at the Fox network, specifically such shows as “The Family Guy” and “House,” that it said consistently mocked religion and people of faith. A Fox spokesman declined to comment.

One example cited in “House” involved lead character Dr. Gregory House, played by Hugh Laurie, telling a religious patient that he was either psychotic or a scam artist for believing that he talked with God.

While the PTC generally praises reality television as a place where one can actually slip a genuine expression of religious views past faith-suppressing network censors, they’re really not going to be pleased with Fox’s attempt to ruin even the unscripted space for God-fearing viewers, Who Wants To Dress Up Like Jesus And Steal Some Christian Babies? Hosted, of course, by the talking devil-child from the hateful Family Guy.

• Report says TV losing its religion [LAT]

Friday
· Music round-up: Dan the Automator at the El Rey; The Blood Arm at the Echo, Dressy Bessy at El Cid.
· Over the weekend the Aero is showing five Pink Panther films–and not one of them is the shitty remake with Steve Martin! You owe it to yourself to attend. [via Flavorpill]
Saturday
· The UCB Theatre again hosts The Dirtiest Sketch in LA contest, where filthy-minded performers try to outporn each other in under three minutes. We heard a girl took out her boobs in the last one, so who knows what you’ll see this time.
· Marc Joseph signs his new book of photographs, New and Used, which features essays, short fiction and poetry by Lydia Davis, Stephen Elliot, Thurston Moore, Jonathan Lethem (and others!) , at Arcana Books in Santa Monica.
Sunday
· More music: Silversun Pickups and Irving at the Troubadour; Guns N’ Roses at the Universal Amphitheatre; The Temporary Thing at Spaceland.
· We do this “blog” stuff for a living and we have no idea what a “blogzine brain-share” consists of, but we’re sure that boosters of the incredibly exciting medium that’s streamlined the sharing of photos of Britney Spears’ vagina will be interested in this event at The Bungalow Club on Melrose.

On the off chance that you haven’t been following the saga of troubled™ American Pie actress Natasha Lyonne that’s been dragging on since last April, CNN.com’s helpful “Story Highlights” box on today’s update should get you all caught up. There is, however, a pitfall to taking the easy shortcut offered by the above bullet points: if you don’t read on into the body of the article to discover that Lyonne barged into the apartment and actually had the canine in hand when she said, “I’m going to sexually molest your dog,” you lose almost all sense of the hilarious, poodle-diddling jeopardy in which the quivering animal suddenly found itself.

• ‘American Pie’ actress turns herself in at court [Reuters]

PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are now posted several times a week–so send them in often. (Every time you do, an angel gets its wings! ) Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put “sighting” or “PrivacyWatch” in the subject line) and let everyone know about how ridiculous K-fed’s sneaking-into-the-Pirates-of -the-Caribbean-ride game is.

In today’s episode: Chris Rock; Colin Farrell; Drew Barrymore and Carmen Electra; David Spade; Kevin Federline; Jessica Biel; Kirstie Alley; David Caruso; David Lynch; Anna Paquin; Marg Helgenberger; Adam Brody; Mary Lynn Rajskub; Adam Goldberg and Christina Ricci; Sean Hayes; Casey Affleck; Neal McDonough; Juliette Lewis; Rachel Bilson and David Faustino; Nicky Hilton; Lee Grant; Jon Lands and Michael J. Pollard.

· Last night (Wednesday) doing some last minute errands at the Farmer’s Market, I saw Chris Rock suddenly scurrying by the Gumbo Pot, trying hard not to be noticed in a baseball cap. “Huh,” I shrugged. Ran to do some other errands and then had to go back to the Grove…where I see Chris Rock again, now with a girlfriend (wife? friend?) walking a little less briskly into the parking garage. Huh. Celebrities go Christmas shopping, too

· I was seeing a play at the Elephant theater on Santa Monica and a little street just East of Vine. There are like five theaters on that one little corner, and as I was leaving the show I was seeing, I saw Colin Farrell outside one of the other theaters……. sooooooooooooooo hot looking in a rough trade kinda way (oh great, now I’ll be accused of being his publicist, like when I said Al Pacino looked hot. What can I say? Me like boys.) I’m of Irish descent and have just gotten back from Dublin, but did I say anything? Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

· One Whole Foods store, two sightings, five minutes: My pursuit of good health through better eating was rewarded by sighting the adorably down-to-earth Drew Barrymore (no makeup, casual outfit, so low-key I didn’t recognize her till I heard her voice) and, five minutes later, Carmen Electra. Drew was with a very friendly looking guy whom I guess was her b.f., and she was being so genuinely sweet and nice to the Whole Foods clerks who were helping her that I decided to return the favor by not asking her if I could send my script to her office. Carmen was dressed in kind of a casual, non-revealing top (appropriate for grocery shopping), shiny orange-blonde hair, not much makeup and a short skirt that showed off her very nice legs. Not that I noticed. She smiled downright demurely when she noticed I recognized her; very cute!

· Tszi tszi fly! Tszi tszi fly! David Spade at hamburger hamlet, yes…THAT hamburger hamlet. (Wednesday Dec 13 1.42pm) standing up and lingering alittle too long by his booth after eating with a more blue collar jack black lookalike (if possible)… Spade must be up to something.

· December 13: Saw K-Fed, holding one of his spawn (visual evidence suggests it was one of the Shar-babies), and posse of large African-American men going into the exit of the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland. (Is this how celebs get onto rides without having to deal with the hoi polloi?) Federline and his friends were all wearing these hideous hoodies that looked like baby clothing in adult sizes.

· Jessica Biel with 8 others (including I think Lohan’s former assistant) having dinner at Wahoo’s Fish Taco in Santa Monica. She is beautiful in person, and has amazing boobs. Looked like she was having the tacos from where I sat

· 12/13/06-

Just saw Kirstie Alley in “Paper Goose”, stationary store/print shop in Studio City. She was chatting on her cell phone loud enough so that everyone from here to Northridge could hear her business–some crap about blocking an Enquirer story. She was picking up some invitations she had printed and said they were not what she had ordered. The woman told her that she had faxed a proof for her approval but she had not heard anything back so she just went ahead and printed the invites as originally instructed. Kirstie demanded to have them re-done immediately. The woman at the store explained that she was backed up because of Xmas and then Kirstie just said “Fine! I’ll just work with them!” and walked out in a huff. I am only saying this because she was mean to the employees but homegirl ain’t 145 pounds. Lookin’ tubby.

· My friends and I went to the Magritte exhibit at the LACMA on Saturday, 12/9 (it’s really great, BTW) and we were admiring “Ceci n’est pas une pipe” when I heard a toddler making a lot of noise. I turned around to give the evil eye to the child’s mother when I hear the Horatio Caine voice next to me say “Don’t worry, baby, daddy’s not goin’ anywhere!” Mr. “I quit NYPD Blue after one season” David Caruso was right next to me. He’s taller than I expected (6′) and his hair is really bright orange. His wife and kid are young and cute. I didn’t think it was possible that the character he plays on CSI: Miami is really that over the top, but it turns out that it’s the real David in there.

· Don’t know if you’re interested but David Lynch is back with his cow on the corner of Hollywood and La Brea in support of Laura Dern’s performance in Inland Empire. Mr. Lynch was quite friendly. He posed for photos and smoked. The cow looked less friendly and slightly more scared but resigned to its fate (didn’t look to see if it was male or female) of playing second fiddle to the surreal maestro.

· 12/12 - Saw a petite ANNA PAQUIN with a few girlfriends at OBar Tuesday night. She is a very pretty girl. She and her friends sat at a back booth in plain sight, but I don’t think many people recognized her. It’s a fairly well known fact that Tuesday nights are designated at OBar for the ladies to come “out”. Now, I’m not one to gossip, but if she’s there, then she might be queer.

· Saw Marg Helgenberger (or however you spell her last name) exciting La Partie, the stationary store on Montana. She looked Botoxed but pretty, as you would expect.

· Monday, 12/11. Arclight. 10:50 showing of The Holiday. Spotted Adam Brody (The OC) and an equally attractive male friend in the audience. I’m still confused by this. He’s skinny, but adorable (like, “Wow, I wouldn’t mind sitting on his face for a while” adorable). He’s straight…right? Or was Bilson just his Beard? Why does it seem weird that he’d be at a romantic comedy with another guy?

· Saw the awesome Mary Lynn Rajskub at the Lava Lounge 13th anniversary shindig last night (12/13), enjoying the garage-y musical stylings of the Tulsa Skull Swingers. This brings the number of former Mr. Show cast members I’ve spotted to four (Bob Odenkirk at the Shell station at Sunset & Wilton a few months ago; Dave “Gruber” Allen at the Steve Allen Theater earlier in the year; and Brian Posehn at the Virgin Megastore last year) — five if you count seeing Paul F. Tompkins perform at Largo. Tom Kenny, you’re next!

· this week - christina ricci and adam goldberg at sushi ike. I thought they broke up? they looked very much together at the sushi restaurant. also, they really like tuna sashimi. they got a big plate of both maguro and albacore. didn’t see what else they had. and while I think christina sometimes looks kind of odd on film, she’s very cute and small in person. and on wed, sean hayes from will & grace at lou. he walked in quietly and sat with a female friend with his back to the restaurant. very understated and not very Jack-like at all.

· Who shops at Nature Mart in Los Feliz? On Wednesday evening it was Casey Affleck. The charming small boy in his basket inspired some cheerful conversation with the ‘bulk foods’ section employees. I did not inquire as to whether he brought the boy, or acquired him there at the health food store.

· Saw Neal McDonough of War of the World and Walking Tall fame yesterday morning (12/13) on Larchmont pushing around a baby in a stroller. Seemed pretty normal but still gave off just enough of that “I’m an actor” vibe.

· Yesterday in 90068: Juliette Lewis looking at a house for rent in my neighborhood. Oh please, oh please, Juliette, bring your patented brand of crazy to my block. Wear your skin tight catsuit, play that sweaty rock and roll, whatever you want to do, just do it here!

· My first SUBMITTED sighting and it’s a twofer. Having brunch in the courtyard of Hookah Lounge on Melrose (Old Luna Cafe. Miss it.) before my hummus hit the table I see someone with what can only be described as NOTICE ME hair coming in thru the back gate… It’s the magic man, David Faustino from Married With Children. His hair doubled his height; he came up to my waist. After the meal I was walking out thru the front past the bar, and a cute couple stroll in and I realize it’s Rachel Bilson and some guy who should be playing guitar in a late 90’s band. I don’t think they were meeting with Bud Bundy, but if the buzz around the OC is true, they should probably consider some sort of CW/Warner Brothers spec project. Or temping.

· Saw Nicky Hilton the other night (12/12) at Mastro’s in Beverly Hills dining with her new boyfriend David Katzenberg. Pulled up in a black Range Rover and ducked inside. Nicky was brunette that evening, dressed pretty simply in skinny jeans and a black tunic top. I was surprised at how completely normal she looked - no different than the typical trendy LA girl.

· Saturday, Dec 9th (I kow it’s late, but it SCARED me)

Entering Ralph’s on Beverly at Doheny. Lee Grant. I didn’t want to stare but I’m 99% sure it was her. Damn. When I saw “Mulholland Drive” I thought they were so cruel lighting her. They were actually kind.

· Got a lunch-time two-fer today (Dec. 13th) at Nate n’ Al’s in Beverly Hills. JON LANDIS, of “Animal House” fame (and not much else lately). Dressed in coat, tie and (hmmm) bluejeans. Laughing, chatting amiably; probably thinks no one remembers he caused Vic Morrow’s decapitation on the set of the”Twilight Zone” movie. Two tables over, sitting by himself, was “Bonnie and Clyde” co-star MICHAEL J. POLLARD, enjoying some scrambled eggs. The guy weighs less than Nicole Richie … and was carrying a black and red leather man-purse. Truly odd. But at least he only killed people on-screen.

How bad have things gotten for Tara Reid? Apparently, so bad that she’ll have to travel all the way to a Marriott in Chicago to get someone to pay her a modest appearance fee in exchange for downing tequila shots, dancing on top of a bar, and occasionally shouting a slurred “Woooo!” on New Year’s Eve, activities which a basic cable channel once paid her to perform at drinking establishments all over the world. We can’t bear to see Reid in such a desperate state, so party promoters of Los Angeles, we beg of you: Please make her an offer to let her stay in town for the biggest (amateur) drinking night of the year; we’re sure the Chicago people haven’t sold too many of those $135 and $165 tickets yet, and would be compassionate enough to release her from her commitment if a less embarrassing offer came along.

• Future Forward NYE.07 [PureFuture.com]

To bring you up to date on what the media (well, Gawker) has dubbed Chingchonggate, People’s 2006 Scariest Lesbian Alive Rosie O’Donnell first addressed the ongoing controversy–her personal “macaca”–on her website, putting some of her thoughts on the matter into her trademark blogku verse. She finally addressed the matter directly on yesterday’s The View, saying, “Apparently ‘ching chong,’ unbeknownst to me, is a very offensive word” to “Japanese people,” a gaffe that instantly made us nostalgic for the days of Michael Richards reaching out to the “Afro-American” community. She then apologized, though tempering it by saying “there’s a good chance I’ll do something like that again…’cause that’s how my brain works.” Apparently, that wasn’t good enough:

Karen Lincoln Michel, president-elect of Unity: Journalists of Color Inc., said O’Donnell’s remarks “really didn’t sound like an apology to me.”

Lincoln Michel said Unity was waiting for Barbara Walters, who created the show, to respond to a letter asking her to publicly acknowledge that O’Donnell’s remarks were “patently offensive.”

“I think by allowing Rosie O’Donnell’s cheap jabs at Chinese Americans to go unchecked, then the network is essentially condoning racial and ethnic slurs,” Lincoln Michel told the AP in a phone interview.

We’re not sure what penance these Journalists of Color would deem most sufficient for O’Donnell’s ching-chong crimes: Perhaps not until she adopts a dozen Chinese babies and promises to raise them in a household free of offensive exaggerations of their homeland’s tongue can the first steps towards healing truly begin.

• Group Not Satisfied With Rosie’s Apology [ABCNews/AP]